rubbish. (me, currently.)

patrick and josh got on a plane at 3:30 this morning, at which point the last of the friends that had come over to spend one final night with them went home themselves. i have really grown to love those boys...and consequently i am feeling pretty out-of-sorts today, to put it mildly. how blessed am i to have them and aubri and nathan and natalie and robert and kevin and leah for family now. i wouldn't wish this semester to go on forever; that wouldn't be right, obviously. but when you pour your heart into something together...when others see you at your weakest, your most stressed moments, your ecstatic ones, your thankful ones...well, this is what community is supposed to look like. this is what God had in mind for us. and it's really scary, because i've opened myself up to people and now i am hurting. but it'll be okay. and i never really have to say goodbye for good.

kevin, leah, and nathan are all back from an international globalscope conference in georgia, so things don't feel too empty and we'll get back into a rhythm for these last three weeks.

in a few days, i'll go stay with helen's family in manchester and see iron and wine. following thursday is my birthday...i think plans for a jazz club are in the works...and ash and company have taken it upon themselves to host a party (at canvas) the following saturday. england-themed. i think i've decided to go as john lennon.

in other words...three weeks will be gone long before i'm ready.

i have some specific things i'm really praying for these last few weeks if you would join me without me writing about them. God knows. just like i have grown to love my team, i have grown to love more than i can put into words the friends i've made here. they are absolutely amazing people.

i can tell you that in everything i say and do, i want God to get the attention, the glory, the thanks, because more than all of the blessings He's poured into my life, God Himself is the goal of my life, and His favor and perfect love i desire more than any person's approval or affection.

sometimes i forget that this is true and i don't live like it. will you please pray for a strength and boldness and compassion that is not my own for these final weeks in birmingham?

(thank you, wonderful family. i am overwhelmed by you and love you so much. and i am coming home to you soon!)